Sunday, March 3, 2013

Quarter of a Century

Oh man ... it is finally here ... I am a quarter of a century old ... holy cow ... I seriously can't believe it! Is there such thing as a quarter life crisis? Oh ... yup ... there is ... I just looked it up ... thanks google! Ok ... too dramatic ... Ill take it down a notch.

I actually don't feel very different ... if I don't think about how old I indisputably am ... I know that I am not old ... by any stretch of the imagination ... but I sure feel like it! But really ... I started to feel old as soon as I hit twenty-two. I'm over it.

R was laughing at me ... but this is my new year ... I don't believe in new year resolutions ... but I think I am ready for changes ... nay ... I am craving changes! I am now going to proceed telling the whole entire bloggosphere what I want to change ... or things I want to do with this old age ... maybe that will hold me better accountable.

1 - I want to get in better shape ... I was continuing my losing weight streak up until we got E ... since then I have let it slowly slip ... and since I no longer had a gym pass it has been gone completely ... holy cow ... bad news. Since R and I have had E (I gain weight when I am stressed ... in a monumental way) I have gained fifteen pounds ... fifteen pounds ... do you realize what that looks like on someone of my height and stature ... well ... lets just say I look like a different person! R and I have decided to train first for a 10k to be ran at the end of the summer ... but to do a half marathon at the end of next march with my mom.

2 - I want to stop eating so many sweets! I mean ... everyone already knows that I have the largest sweet tooth around ... I would eat sugar for breakfast, lunch, and dinner if I could. When I was a kid I used to grab a big spoon and stuff my mouth full of straight sugar ... whoops ... there's a confession mom and dad ... I mean ... you used to wonder why the floor was sticky ... not all of it got into my mouth. But lately in my old age I have begun to feel a shift ... I want salty things too! I think it really hit me when the blonde lady on this season of Biggest Loser was told that she had toxic levels of sugar in her system ... I think the doc would keel over with how much sugar I probably have in my system! I mean ... I cook healthy meals (I'm super big on that) ... E rarely ever gets anything sugary at our house (and seems ok with it ... maybe she gets loaded up at her moms house ... she did come back today with two boxes of peeps and a sucker [her tongue was even already pink] ... hmmmm) ... but I wish I could say the same for Es parents! R and I love sweets! maybe with this shift I am feeling I can finally kick the addiction.

3 - I want to write a book ... alright ... this is a lifelong goal ... but I think I have had some good ideas lately ... and don't worry ... I actually have very good grammar ... I just like this whole stream of conscious thing that I have going with this blog. 

4 - I want to craft more ... I love crafting ... and my wonderful in-laws got me a saw for my birthday! hello dream! I can also get pallets from them ... uh ... hello dream again! I think that I will start to tap into my creative side again this year ... even if I can't take beautiful pictures with a beautiful new camera ... I can re-teach myself how to paint ... I can do crafts ... I can make a goal to go on Craft Wars!!! Is that show even still on? I totally could have done it ... I mean ... I only saw one episode ... but my ideas were so much better than the contestants ... yes ... I am patting my own back right now.

5 - I want to get in touch with my daughter. This one should be first. E and I are growing together ... but it is rough ... it takes a whole heck of a lot. I want to put in more effort.

6 - I want to be more selfless. I want to be better at giving of my time and talents. Put more effort into getting out of myself and helping others ... maybe I'll finally start putting into action my abuse and addiction recovery center for which I only have have of a business plan written up ... maybe I'll work towards becoming an advocate for those things ... perhaps if I do this then my dream of this place will actually come to fruition. Not only will being selfless be good ... but it will force me to be kinder ... I feel like I have been a little rude lately ... have a bit of a tough exterior ... I think I need to finally shed what is left of the bruises left by the ex and go back to who I was before ... well ... a better version of that person ... being selfless will for sure help with that.

Six should be good right? I mean ... those are some tall orders aren't they? Remember ... they aren't new years resolutions ... they are just things I would like to improve about myself!

Ok friends ... I love you ... thanks for twenty five years full of great stories and good times that you all have provided me with.

Oh! Be ready ... I have already written a hot topic for tomorrow ... and we haven't had one of those in a while!

Goodnight lovelies!